Monday, February 4, 2008

I Have Been Blessed

We are home from a long, exciting weekend in Columbus. We went home after ice-skating lessons on Saturday, and came back last night after Eli won the Super Bowl. And, no, I'm not going to jump on the Eli bandwagon now. I was very excited for him, but all of these people who have never watched a football game before, but are now the biggest Eli supporters crack me up. Me, I will stay on the Peyton bandwagon, but I am very happy for the Manning family. Their mother must be proud.
This week I had to go to an oncology class for work, and one of the topics covered was Death, and how we, as nurses, are to play a part, and how we are affected. One thing the lady teaching the class said that caught my ear was, "It is an honor and a privilage to be with someone as they are dying." How true is that? As a nurse, I get so much satisfaction when we get to send someone to the house, but it is such an honor to be with someone as they prepare to go Home. I work on a floor where people have come to terms with the fact that they may not go home. i have experienced death a few times prior to becoming a nurse, but never like this before. Yes, it was hard when I lost my grandfather in the 9th grade when he lost his battle to cancer, but I did not understand. And I spent lots of time being angry with God after he took Josh when I was a senior in high school. He was so young. I got to be by Beebish 's side when we found out that she, as well, would be going Home. I have experienced death in the hospital setting as well. but this week, I understood what a privelage it was. I have a hard time seperating my emotions from my nursing. Our patients stay a minimum of WEEKs at a time, some more like MONTHS. They become my family. I lost a dear, dear patient this week, and a dear, dear friend. I was lucky enough to be able to go to his visitation on Saturday, and what a blessing it was to me. Yes, it was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I became close to this man, and his family. He had been with us at the hospital since NOVEMBER! But, what an honor it was to be able to know this man is Home now, and no longer suffering. I will miss his smiling face, he never quit smiling. I will miss holding his hand when he was scared of what was going on. I will miss his wife's hugs, I will miss knowing that she is sitting in his room any time I want to go by and chat. I have truly been blessed. To be a part of this man's life.
I pray that when it is my time to go, that I have peace. And that everyone knows what they mean to me. I have had friendships that have dwindled over the years, and this weekend their importance came rushing back to me. God put all of those people in my life, and I feel such a longing to have them back. Our lives have taken us all seperate places, but they still have such an important place in my heart. They know who they are too, some I have talked to about this, others I am not sure how. But, I want o figure out a way. Ok, I have rambled enough, but I wanted to count my blessings today, and everyone to be aware of it. I have a beautiful family, wonderful friends, a God that loves me without end, and a job I adore. What more could I ask for?